Lie To Me: Faux Apple Cinnamon Streusel Muffins
Sometimes lying is bad. The jerk losers who dicked me around during a routine oil change that ended up putting my sweet little Kia into the Car ER? Bad lie. Probably the reason car guys have a lousey rep. All of the lying done by a few bad apples.
Other times, a little lie is super-excellent. Take for instance the muffins referenced in this blog title. Seemingly harmless breakfast or cake in a convenient wrapper? Who knows?!
Dense cake without frosting and passed off as breakfast food is some serious stroke of genius-sort of like those Kudos bars that were actually just a candy bar with some granola bits scattered throughout– but what’s even more exceptional is that those teensie hunks of white, fleshy fruit are not apple bits but Z U C C H I N I B I T S!
I know, crazy. A vegetable dressed up like fruit. A zucchini in apple’s clothing. A product of dishonesty brought to you by an evil Nutritionist (me) in hopes of breaking the fruit vs vegetable for breakfast battle².
I personally can’t get enough of both cake-like breakfast items and zucchini, not to mention all of your home gardens are probably makin’ these babies faster than you can zoodle them. Let’s not muddle through the last days of summer with boring zucchini breads and halfhearted heaps of veggie noodles. We have all winter to be depressed, why start now?
Faux Apple Cinnamon Streusel Muffins
Check out that zucch!
Also, that’s what she said.
And now to the final step of the transformation process. This is when a girl becomes a woman. This is when a lowly zucchini becomes a health food sensation.
This is when you add butter.
Just in case the substitution of zucchini wasn’t healthy enough for you freaks, I went ahead and made the streusel portion from sunflower seeds.
Those vegetable hunks ↑ and ↓ are looking apple AF right now.
Gosh, we are so healthy. It’s almost as if we should eat these EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
¹ The answer is: no one cares because cake for breakfast without judgement is what makes most of life livable. Eat your muffin cake and can it, haters.
² Technically it’s not a battle but more so a peaceful protest on vegetables being pigeonholed to savory breakfast menu items.